


Gay's the Word

by drwhogirl



Series: Lucy Trainor [3]
Category: Doom Patrol (TV)
Genre: Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:55:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26517076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drwhogirl/pseuds/drwhogirl
Summary: Lucy is having a bad day when she meets someone from Larry's past
Series: Lucy Trainor [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1867765
Kudos: 3





	Gay's the Word

John wasn’t sure why he had decided to do this. His husband had told him that it might be cathartic to go to a reunion, show those who doubted him how much better off he was without them. Only then his husband had to work. And now he was stuck at a table, in a bar, with people he couldn’t stand. The only person from those days he would have wanted to catch up with, wished he could catch up with, had been dead for sixty years.

As he pondered this, he noticed the room around him go quiet. Looking up, he saw the reason for the lull. There was a young woman, in her late 20s at most, had entered the bar. She was wearing a t-shirt and tight-fitting jeans, dark curls tumbling around her shoulders. She took off the pair of aviators covering her clear blue eyes and, on noticing John’s curious gaze, flashed him a smile. The aviators went into the pocket of her battered leather jacket and approached the bar.

John thought there was something… familiar… about her. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on until he heard one of the other patrons yell at her.

“Oi! Trainor! What have I told you about coming in here?”

The woman turned to look at the man that yelled at her. Trainor. Larry. Of course. She must have been a relative, grandchild maybe? “Last I checked it was a free country.”

“Last I checked this wasn’t a gay bar. Your kind aren’t welcome.”

“Says who exactly?” She folded her arms across her chest, glaring at the man in question.

“Says me, exactly.”

“Well you don't have the authority to stop me.”

“Well you shouldn't be here. Everyone knows all the Trainors are good for is crashing planes. Not flying them.” The entire room went silent. That was a low blow and everyone knew it. It would be a bad thing to say at any base, but they all knew what happened to Larry Trainor. They’d all seen the memorial.

“What did you just say?” Lucy's voice was calm, deadly calm.

“You heard me. Maybe it's good he died when he did. So he didn't have to find out his granddaughter was a queer as well as a disappointment.”

John could see the conflict in Lucy’s eyes. She wanted to punch that smug smile off the guy’s face. John did too. But Lucy would be risking her career and John had made a promise to his husband that he wouldn’t cause any trouble. 

Lucy clenched her jaw, biting back a scathing remark. Choosing instead to remove herself from the situation. A beer really wasn’t worth all this trouble.

John waited until the bar was once more filled with noise and conversation before following her outside. 

John approached the solitary figure silhouetted by the street light.

“If you’ve come to take some more cheap shots then you can fuck off.” Lucy snapped, on hearing his footsteps approach.

“I’m here to make sure you’re okay.” John told her honestly. Lucy turned to look at him and he could see the tears streaming down her cheeks.

“I’ll be alright.” She reached up and tried to wipe away her tears. 

“You will you know.”

“What?”

“You will be alright. It will be better. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not even five years from now. But it will get better.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because I have been where you are. It's hard being true to yourself. But the key is to become comfortable enough in yourself that people like them don't matter to you anymore.” John paused for a moment looking over at the memorial plaque on the wall behind her. “It can be a struggle but you can do it.”

“I don't know…”

“You know, I knew another pilot who had a similar problem back in the day. He tried to be everything everyone wanted him to be. A good father, a good husband, a good boyfriend. But he spent so long trying to make everyone else happy that he never let himself be happy.”

“What happened to him?” She asked. John didn't say anything, instead he just looked at the plaque again. “It was grandpa?”

“I was his ground chief that day.”

Lucy fiddled with the seam on her leather jacket not wanting to make eye contact. “Did you know him well?”

“Sometimes I think I knew him better than he really knew himself.”

“Do you… do you think they were right? That he would be disappointed in me because I'm… you know…”

“No. Never.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Remember when I told you that he tried to be a good boyfriend?” The girl nodded. “We were lovers.”

Lucy's jaw dropped. “You… he… what?”

“Your grandfather was gay. He didn't want to come out because he would have lost his job, his family, everything he had worked for. He would have been so proud of you. Not just for getting to where you are in your career. But for doing what he couldn't and being true to yourself.” John was surprised when the girl suddenly hugged him, unsure what to do, he awkwardly hugged her back. 

“Thank you so much. You don't know how much this means to me. He was always my hero and now…” Lucy let go of him and stepped back, realising something. “I’m so sorry. We’ve only just met. That was….”

“Fine. It was fine.”

“I’m Lucy Trainor by the way. We seem to have skipped the introductions.”

John laughed a little at that. “I’m John Bowers.”

“Nice to meet you John Bowers. You know… if you're interested I would love to hear any stories you have about my grandpa. Can I buy you a drink?”

“You want to go back in there?” He asked sceptically.

It was Lucy's turn to laugh now. “No, somewhere less bigoted.”

“In which case I would be honoured.”

**Author's Note:**

> The fic is named after an LGBT bookshop in London. I was in there recently and a lot of what John tells Lucy is what was said to me when I was having issues with my own sexuality.


End file.
